Archive for October, 2008

molluscs and gingerbread robots

October 30, 2008 · Filed under homeschooling, unschooling

Yesterday I ‘taught a lesson’ on molluscs with a group of early primary-school aged children. 

First, some background.  Our homeschool co-op had decided that the older children in the group might enjoy/benefit from a more structured session at our regular gathering – maybe a science tutorial?  I was definitely interested in this concept, as T has become a somewhat reluctant participant at co-op.  He very much likes his friends there, but I felt if there was another drawcard – something “new”, or “interesting” happening, this might get us over the current hurdle of not really wanting to go.

In summary, I searched for a facilitator, none was to be found, and so I volunteered to take some sessions myself.  Hence my foray into the world of the primary school teacher.   I looked through the various ’science for kids’ books that I have.   I came up with “molluscs”, which was a composite theme, to include three of these activities.  I googled molluscs to familiarise myself with basic mollusc facts.  I bought some live oysters from the fish shop, and arranged my materials.  I roughed out a “lesson plan” – starting with that brilliant opening line…… “Does anyone know what a mollusc is?”  I then facilitated the session.

I think the kids enjoyed it.  They *loved* the literally ‘garden variety’ snails, whereas my specially sourced live oysters were discarded early.  However, my overall experience reinforced my prejudices about how kids learn.   Basically, I don’t think they learnt anything.  They got to regurgitate learning they already had.  They got distracted, went off topic, daydreamed, walked away.  It would be easy to think- well, that’s because they’re only 4! or 5! or 6!  But that’s not true. 

I have been with T when he has initiated the topic.  He’s is capable of long periods of concentration and able to grasp concepts – and grapple with them until he feels comfortable that he has reached a level of competence that meets his need.    He’s also relentless in his quest for information.  Questions that I wish would go away - ”how can I build a rocket?” - recur until I grit my teeth and get the answer (thank you library!)  When the child is interested – they can pretty much learn anything.  And not just for that moment, either – that learning is retained.  No repetition of the information is required – unless we’re double checking or cross referencing.

As the “teacher” yesterday, my overall feeling was that my role was a composite of entertainment and crowd control.  The topic of “molluscs” was a way for me to not feel scared that I was responsible for these kids and what were we going to DO??   Luckily for me, I don’t have to report on any outcomes.  So with these new insights I can let go of “learning about science”, and focus on having fun with the kids.  Maybe providing some materials to explore and then take it from there.

I was feeling good about natural learning.  At 8.30 that night, as I was following along with T’s suggestion to make gingerbread robots, I was thinking “I must be MENTAL – if they were going to school tomorrow they’d be in bed by now!”

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Sarah Palin: a case study

October 30, 2008 · Filed under feminism, homeschooling, parenting, politics

Ok, I am forced to quickly record some thoughts before this lady (barring a minor miracle) disappears off the world stage.  What more could be said about her?  In all my reading, I haven’t read what I’m thinking, so I’m writing it here….. in all it’s unformed confusion.

Woman with 5 month old son with downs syndrome (and pregnant teenage daughter) applies for position as 2IC of the free world, with excellent chance of further promotion.   Could we have a more compelling example of the feminist conundrum?  Could her family need her any more?   Could the job on offer provide any more  ”meaning”, and a real sense of making a difference?   Women can, and should be able to “do anything”,  but children, especially babies, need their mums. 

This to me is the failure of feminism, in that rather than changing societal structures to value and accommodate parenting, in the main, feminism gave women societal permission to behave like men.   This is a dead end – we need to find a new path, for all of us.  My beef with feminism is essentially that it pushed the costs of the patriarchal/capitalist system down the hierarchy to an even more disempowered group – children.  That is, many of the advances made by women into work, have come at the expense of their children’s best interests – namely parental time and care.

My favourite Germaine Greer quote: “equality is a poor substitute for liberation”.  Freedom to choose is what liberation is about.   To do something voluntarily is to be empowered.   This is what is powerful about the voluntary simplicity movement, and as an aside, is also one of my gripes about schooling.  That it is compulsory – kids “have” to go, they don’t choose.   Anyone in the helping profession can tell you that programs pretty much only work when the person wants – chooses – to participate.  Why should kids be any different?  

Your choice to spend time with your children, over other opportunities, is the ultimate expression of your love.  This applies to both mothers and fathers.  When children  know in their hearts that their parents had ‘no choice’, I think they can understand and move on.   When they know in their hearts that their parents did have a choice, and that they weren’t chosen, that is much harder to reconcile.  

So, Sarah Palin has two once-in-a-lifetime opportunities – to spend time mothering her new baby son or to run for Vice President of the USA.  One job, she is the only person who can do it.  The other job could be done by many.   

I feel somewhat conflicted about this.  If I have to choose between support for the competing principles of freedom to choose, or proscribing the ‘right’ choice, then for me, freedom to choose is the over-riding principle.  But I reserve the right to be sad about some of the choices, and advocate for those who don’t get to make a choice.   I wasn’t thinking about abortion at all, but I guess that is ultimately the pro-choice position. 

We need to reject the false construct that ’work is community’ with family off to the side, and move forward with systemic ways that re-integrate family, real community and work.

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On blogging

October 28, 2008 · Filed under blogging, relationships

P is baffled by my blog.   This is not an activity that he can understand any time being spent on.   In a recent conversation P commented that he often thinks we don’t have much in common, but then gets out into the world and talking to other women thinks: “thank god for that nutcase at home!”  Funny how we don’t have anything in common, but can agree that everyone else is a weirdo!!  We’ve created our own cult of two!  (but we’re breeding more members…..)

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the joy of nowhere to go, nothing to do

October 26, 2008 · Filed under being present, homeschooling, parenting

alternative title:  the price of addiction

Enroute home from T’s swimming lesson we stop at the servo to vacuum the car – a regular event to try to keep the detritus at bay.   I want a coffee, and these days, even BP has a barista.  I come up with a plan whereby I will buy some petrol, even though I don’t *need* petrol.  That way, I can leave the kids in the car in the shade within eyeshot, while I pay for the petrol and also get my flat white.  

Pumping petrol, J is insistent that he wants to get out of the car.  Ok, I know this isn’t ideal, as I now have to get him back into his car seat, but on the other hand, I can feel virtuous that I am now *not* leaving my kids unattended in the car.

In we go, and disaster waits.  J spots a display of model motorbikes.  I decide that we are not buying one of these, in the face of J’s mounting insistence “BUY MOTORBIKE!”  Meltdown ensues.  The only member of the public to acknowledge my dilemma is a young surfer – he catches my eye, laughs, shakes his head and offers J counsel: “life’s tough sometimes mate!”

I diligently reflect feelings:  “You like the motorbike.”  “You want to buy a motorbike.”  “You’re upset that mum isn’t buying you a motorbike.”   In the parenting books children calm down in the face of such acknowledgement.  My kids just scream louder:  “YEEESSSSSS!!!!!!”

I manage to get J out to the car, and close the door.  He’s not in his seat and won’t be for ages.  Given the queues for petrol, I illegally drive away from the bowser to a parking spot.  T takes this as permission for him to bounce around the car untethered as well.

The stars align/God smiles.  The seabreeze comes in – so we won’t perish in a hot car - and we have absolutely nothing else planned for the day.  We can sit here and ride out the storm.   J screams for a while and then has some boobie, and then is upset a while more.  Intermittently we chat about stuff we see – the dog in the car, the man pumping air into his scooter’s tyres, different vehicles driving past. 

T unearths the stash of books in the glovebox, and we read about Uranus, Saturn and Mercury.   T & I make up songs about his current favourite topic – superheroes.  T is Rocketman, I am Spaceship Woman and J is Jumping Man (J came up with that himself!).  We work on rhymes for our songs.  

T is completely relaxed.   I don’t know whether this is the joy of being 5, or if this is something that I have actually got right.  T  seems to have a real sense of scarcity about material things (down to who got the most toothpaste), but no sense of scarcity of time.  Time we have in abundance.  Most likely he knows that right now mum is fully present, and when we get home she’ll probably be distracted again.

Ninety minutes later, we’re strapped in and off, trying to catch a car pulling a boat with a flag, all the way to the marina.  We watch a boat being launched.  It doesn’t have a flag, but we’re happy with it.

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transcendence at the swing

October 23, 2008 · Filed under being present, parenting

Welcome to my never-anticipated blog.

Today was the first day of T’s new art class.  It clashed with Playschool, etc, so we were off to a very bad start.  My ambivalence about our “solution” to the TV question will no doubt provide on-going boring fodder for this forum.

Regardless, we got there, and after some initial reluctance, T was able to construct a clay rocket.  (The theme was animals, but luckily the facilitator was able to remain true to the spirit of artistic endeavour and be supportive of all ideas.)  This took 5 minutes of a 90 minute program, and then T joined J & I outside in the (lovely) grounds.   Ok, now I’m being tested.  We’ve just paid a decent amount of money for this program and plus I’m experiencing the “what will the other adult (in this case the facilitator) be thinking” phenomenon.  I try a variety of verbal suggestions in the hope that T will be inspired to return to the art room and participate in the program.  No dice.   Eventually I go inside and talk to the facilitator.  She is very relaxed.   I tell her that I am trying to practice detachment, and as soon as I do this, I am detached. 

T, J & I enjoy the gardens, wandering down the little paths.  We scoop about 10 of the tiniest tadpoles ever for our new frog pond back home.  Not too long after, the rest of the art class is outside too.  I don’t know if we have been a subverting influence or if they regularly do this.  T joins their group for a short while.  J is urgent to get to the playground he has spotted.  I call out to the facilitator to let her know that is where we are, and soon after T is there with us.   I ask if he wants to do painting – I think that is what the group is going to do - T informs me they’re planting beans (No evidence of this is ever spotted later) and he’s not interested.  

J loves to swing.  I love to push.  I don’t *always* love to push at the beginning, but I always love it by the end.  It’s like a gift – to keep on pushing until he has had enough.  A few weeks ago on RN they were talking about the song “Swing Low Sweet Chariot”.  Apparantly it is the most popular song in the world.  I always thought it was a spiritual song, but it is a slave song – apparantly a code for how you could escape over the Mississippi.  They played a variety of versions – including a reggae one from Eric Clapton I had never heard before.  I love it, and now I sing it as I push & J swings - not for long though – J is adamant: “Stop that!”  I can’t sing for quids!

We discover a church next door, reinvented as a plant/second hand shop.  It has a great permaculture garden around it and I’m really hoping it will be open if we get there earlier next time.  We mosey back to the art class, in time to chat with the facilitator about how T’s rocket will be fired in a kiln and help with the clean up.   “A little bit of art and a lot of park” I say to the facilitator, and T seems keen to come back next week.

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